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America's Finest News Source.
Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.
Mike Maguire
David Miner

Norm Archer

Cock Puncher

Dana Dobbs

Sensei

Dennis McCormick

Michael Bolton

Ahmed

White Black Guy Tim

Ivy Leaguer

Cooking Show Chef

Wizard Proteus

Rodney Dangerfield